The morning after the night before.

So... it seems after a quick update the other day I find myself once again parked on my ample bottom blogging. I wish there was an off switch for the thoughts goin round in my head I had an un-sweetened cocoa with a lot of cinnamon this morning... all i could think was there's milk in this... how much milk?... oh too much of course. last night i almost (figuratively) removed the head off the Man who cooked dinner for the household. 4 different starchy vegetables!!!! seriously!!!! I like to think I'm doing better with how I approach my food related thoughts. but i draw the line at the carbo loaded vegetables last thing at night >.< the 18th was not a good day to be making me feel more like a undefined undulating mass of flesh. i think it was done to try and make me feel better on such a shit day. he couldn't remember what exactly was making me act like blobzilla but he had the sense to act like he remembered.

i hate the Blah days that are hanging around this week the weather is looking iffy which doesnt help.

anyways to turn this post around I tried to teach myself to knit... and ok I'm not the best but It's not eating after all :P

now i got this pattern, and i really want to make it work but I can't for the life of me work out how to do it, so if someone lovely like say PERI were to help me understand WTH its trying to tell me to do I can make it work LOL.

here goes.

TODDLER DRESSING GOWN:
using Ping Pong yarn #162 by knitwise pricewise
4mm needles of course :)

Abbrv.
St/s -Stich/es
K -Knit
RS -right Side
WS -Wrong Side
Beg. -Begin/ning
Cont. -Continue
M1(2,3,etc) -Make 1 (2,3,etc) stitch
Sl -Slip
PSSO -Pass Slipped Stitch Over
Dec -decrease
Inc -Increase
Foll -Follow/ing
Alt -Alternate
Rem -remain/ing
Ktog -Knit 2 sts together.

CREATE:
Back and fronts (worked in one piece to armholes) cast on 47 Sts.
Knit in Garter St (1st row is RS) until work measures 37cms from Beg,workin last row on WS.
Divide for armholes and shape nick and collar.
-
1st row - K14, turn.
Cont. on these 14 sts for right front.
2nd and Foll Alt rows (WS)- Knit
3rd row (RS) -K2, M1, sl 1, K1, psso, knit to end =14sts
5th row -K2, M1, K1, sl 1, K1, psso, Knit to end =14sts
7th row -K3, sl 1, k1, psso, Knit to end = 13sts
9th row -K2, M1, k2, sl 1, K1, psso, knit to end =13sts
(that part was easy)
11th row -K4, sl 1, K1, psso, knit to end = 12 sts. (I've done up to here )

(now here is where i cant for the life of me work out WTH they want me to do.)

cont dec for neck and inc for collar in this manner, working inc for collar in every 4th row from previous inc 3 more times, at the same time dec for neck in every foll alt row 3 times =12 sts.
knit 2 rows garter stitch.(so if you could be so kind and give me the ((retarded NOOBS)) instructions ((that is the next 12 rows)) written in nooblish terms)
Shape shoulder - next row (ws) -cast/bind off 6 sts, knit to end =6 sts.(this is due to it being a multi size pattern)
cont in garter st on these 6 sts for right back collar a further 6.5 cms working last row on WS cast/bind off loosely
with RS facing, join yarn to rem sts.
Next row (rs) -K19, turn.
Cont on these 19 sts for Back and knit 21 rows garter st.
Shape shoulders - cast/bind off 6 sts at beg of next 2 rows. cast/bind off rem 7 sts loosely
with RS facing, join yarn to rem 14 sts for left front and knit across these sts.
2nd and foll alt rows (ws) -knit
3rd row - Knit to last 4 sts, K2tog, M1, K2 =14sts.
5th row -knit to last 5 sts, K2tog, K1, M1, k2 =14sts.
7th row - Knit to last 5 sts, K2tog, K1, M1, K2 = 13sts.

(here I also require Nooblish instructions please)

cont dec for neck and inc for collar in this manner, working inc for collar in every foll 4th row from previous inc., 4 more times, at the same time dec for neck in every foll alt row 5 times = 12 sts.
knit 1 row.
Shape shoulder - next row (RS) -cast/bind off 6 sts, knit to end. = 6sts (this is due to it being a multi size pattern)
cont in garter st on these 6 sts for left back collar for a further 6.5 cms working last row on WS. cast/bind off loosely.

Sleeve (make 2)
cast on 10 sts.
Knit 4 rows Garter st.
cont. in garter st, inc 1 st at each end of next row, then in every 12th row until there are 16sts.
cont without shaping until sleeve measures 23cms from beg, working last row on WS cast/bind off rem sts loosely.
 

seriously it looked easy but well i guess it's not  >.< so if anyone could convert this to Nooblish for me please it would be MUCH appreciated. before the kid I'm trying to make this for grows way too big for it would be nice :P